Sometimes all of us need some help to break out of the loops in life.  A few years ago, I noticed a strange change in myself. There was a constant feeling of unease..I felt like danger looming... a catastrophe going to happen. I tried hard to track down the reasons, but my mind was not giving me answers. I realized there is no apparent reason to feel this way if I can't point to it, right away. I thought to myself, "After all, there are scores of people in real situations at hand, and they don't worry! Why do I?" It was a valid point, and my logical self wanted to believe it badly but somehow I wasn't convinced. Soon, I started showing physical symptoms like feeling shortness of breath and general hot flashes. This is when I paused and thought to myself - "This can't be normal". I do realize now that when my mind space was such, I would also have been defensive in my demeanor in public. I tried to shoot back counters to anyone who wanted to judge me ...

Photo by Goutham Ganesh Sivanandam on Unsplash It was a laid back weekend afternoon, a perfect day for home shopping. I was walking with my extra-large cart, through the aisles of Ikea. Blinded by the colors of the pillow covers, I was oscillating between looking at the items on display and my way ahead. Maneuvering through the narrow bends, I pushed my cart cautiously. Just then, a lady (middle-aged), engrossed in picking between the two pillow-covers in her hand, stepped backward and appeared right in front of my cart. Obviously, you guessed it - We crashed! My instant reaction was "Sorry". Sorry because, firstly, most probably just like me, she was blinded too, by the colorfully tempting cushions on display. Secondly, it was a mishap. No one decks up and leaves home planning to accidentally hurt someone at Ikea. My "sorry" was not an expression of regret. It was an expression of sympathy. I do understand, English can be complicated. Maybe something the East Indi...

Photo by  Patrick Hendry  on  Unsplash Life rewards us in mysterious ways. You "blend in" and get immediate results that amount to gratification and happiness. You may "Stand out" because you are a natural, but the world will question your worth.  "Standing up", is the real deal.  Just like fitting in, Standing up is also a choice... the tougher choice that we make to be true to ourselves. At first, it gives nothing back to us except fear, hate, and friction. But if we hang in there using this friction, we will start to see us as an evolved version of ourselves. We will be someone describable in a few good words. We will find our identity. Even in the literal sense, Friction is the force that opposes motion. But we know that it eventuall y   helps us. Without friction, we would touch but won't be able to feel, would draw but won't be able to leave the impressions of it, would try to climb but won't move upwards, would flow with the current but ...

Photo by  Ladd Greene  on  Unsplash There is an old story of a frog in boiling water. It is relevant even today in the context of how we look at our jobs. It might be useful to learn a thing or two, looking back at this story in new light. The stories goes like this. There was a frog that deliberately hopped into a pot. The pot had fresh water so it indulged in swimming around a bit. Not too long later, the pot of water started getting warm. Frog didn't know that the pot was set on flame to warm up. The water was getting warm, warmer and so on. Frog could now foresee that its only going to get hotter from here on. It contemplated taking the leap out of the pot but, since frogs have the skill to withstand temperature up until boiling point, it stayed on waiting for that point. Once it got too hot to handle, coping with heat was getting difficult. Soon the frog got to a point of exhaustion and it simply succumbed. It could no longer make the leap. All its energy had been sp...

Pic source : pixabay  Today is Mother's day. The day when our children cluelessly wish us "Happy mothers day". It is a special day when we acknowledge the hard work that goes into being a mom.  A roles of a mother has so much dichotomy. We wear many faces but have to make sure that the most pleasant face is the one showing. While you are trying to manage all your ten roles, the most important is the one that makes sure your kids see you as a juggler supermom, who means well and not as a scary monster, who is out to get them. As a mother and in general, why do we feel the need to juggle so many roles? Simply because it's mandatory to be perfect and better than the others.  Thats what they said. And they still say so much. If you have a career, they say you are too busy for you kids. If you are a stay at home-mom,  they say you can do more. And if you do both well, and get close to their "Perfect". They'd simply change the goalpost If you cook well, they s...

Image by : Gerd Altmann from Pixabay The world has made "being opinionated" synonymous to possessing mastery. Achievers are described as people who have strong opinions and are not afraid to push it through. Having strong opinions is almost heroic. But, in this ever changing world, where there is no "permanent", aren't your rigid opinions, hardened by your experience, replaceable for the better? Even in case of successful negotiation, there are many studies pointing to the fact that flexibility, self-awareness and EQ are the cornerstones. Almost any consequential social interaction involves a degree of negotiation. Hence, working on mastering negotiation might make life easier. One of the first questions one must answer, in the process of negotiation is - "Who are you negotiating with?". This doesn't just mean knowing the person but understanding the other person's view point and priorities. Being able to think flexibly is a virtue an...